Worst Date Ever

My worst date ever was this last February. I met the guy on the worst dating site ever (hindsight is 20/20). We'd texted for awhile and he asked me to lunch on a weekday. He lived outside of town, so I got to pick the place; Coco Bolos (my favorite). For the record, 66.6% of my first dates that occur there are bad. He called, he didn't know where the restaurant was or where any of the Aggieville landmarks I used as references were (guys, research this stuff). So, he was 10 minutes late.

He walks into the place and it hits me that he looks a bit different than his photos. He also looks like he just got up and grabbed whatever clothing he could find. He wore a Aeropostale hoodie, ski hat (yes, even indoors) with sunglasses propped on his head (which I could see myself in...weird), jeans, and boots.

He spent 15 minutes reading the menu. I tried to give him the cliff notes version of my favorites. Conversation was rough. I did learn some interesting things...he hunts illegally. According to him, it doesn't matter if it's not your land. He also doesn't like kids.

Here's where it gets interesting; our food arrives. He ordered a burrito. I look up from my meal to see him twisting his fork at least a foot in the air over his plate, trying to break the cheese. He must've seen the shocked look on my face, because he said, "I don't know how people eat this properly." I calmly replied, "you could use your knife." The next time I looked up, I couldn't stifle my shock and a small laugh. Why you ask? Well, the fork was still in the air and the knife, well it was in his other hand swiping at the cheese to no avail. No lie, it looked like he was playing a violin. Again, he saw the shock on my face and said, "it's not working." I replied, "one could try cutting it against their plate." Problem solved. Throughout the meal, he mentions that he never goes out to eat; now I know why.

At the end of the meal, the waitress appears and asks if the tickets are together or separate. I wait for him to respond, since he asked me out. DEAD SILENCE. Finally, after an uncomfortably long pause (both for me and the waitress), I respond that it could be separate. Let's just say I was happy to end the "date" and head back to work early.

He texted the next couple of days like nothing weird had happened. I let him know I didn't see us working out. At least I'm not the only one having bad dates...